We decided to opt-out of the Kate and Bill Wales story as we can only tolerate a certain percentage of madness in any given fiscal year. Royal weddings can easily exceed our mandated maximum, especially if they occur in the UK. The madness doesn’t necessarily happen because of the media, as it is expected the ink-stained wretches go all sloppy, but more because of the rampant venal merchandising that gloms its’ mitts onto any occasion.
For instance, the ‘replica’ Royal engagement ring only available in this limited time offer, strict limit of one per household, normally priced at $119.00, now just $39.90, with a hinged velveteen box and Certificate of Authenticity. If one combined folded cigarette foil for the ‘silver’, broken windshield glass for the ‘diamonds’ and a shard of an old Noxzema jar for the ‘sapphire’, then assembled the pieces could be construed as a ‘replica’ of the Kate and Bill engagement ring. It’s so ugly that the ring itself will scuttle under the fridge if you turn on the kitchen lights.
By the same rules of ‘replica’ commemoratives, I’m Ray Charles, because I have at least two feet and so did Ray. We’ll overlook the logic of the comparison as I am younger, Caucasian, untalented, won’t sing, can’t play the piano, am partially sighted and not currently dead. I can however provide a Certificate of Authenticity. I’ll even throw in a hinged velveteen box, so you can call me Ray Charles too.
The madness comes from the reaction of supposedly sane consumers who upon seeing the commercials for any kind of commemorative, immediately whip out the credit card and start pounding the phone to order this material. The Cook Islands, the Franklin Mint and hundreds of other commemorative manufacturers seem to tap into some poorly formed area of the consumer brain that insists on parting with money for commemoratives and collectibles. Why? Are we actually that malformed and lacking in self-esteem that we think the possession of recycled-glass-not-even-close replica of some dead Royal’s ring, somehow will convey the status of near-Royalty to our mantle, if we had a mantle?
Yes. We are that dumb. If we weren’t, these commemorative folks would have gone out of business generations ago, but, like mercury in the bloodstream, they’re still with us.
As for Kate and Bill? We wish them well.
RoadDave 
So, does that mean, for the low one-time price of $19.99, I can purchase you? Please, send me the billing address, and I’ll even pop for the overnight shipping. Now YOU would be a worthwhile addition to ANY collection! 😉
You do the “repro” ring far too much credit. And the mess (the only fitting word) of other commemorative is truly abysmal. The only thing worse is the people who are actually proud of this crap. Stephen Colbert interviewed a lady who has, I kid you not, a pair of commemorative slippers of Chuckles and Lady Diana, that look like each one tucked into bed, with their faces looking like Spitting Image dolls. And she was BURSTING to tell Stephen about them! If all those idiots would send me a dollar, I could either buy my own Pacific Island with room for all my online friends (yes, Dave, you’d be either VP or Minister of Defence, your choice), or enough money to fill my gas tank (if the sum was REALLY large). 😀
But I had to watch. And there was one moment I did actually get misty. William was standing at the altar, Catherine was making her way up the aisle, and Harry turned around briefly to catch a glimpse of Catherine. I could just see Lady Diana standing next to him nudging him with an elbow and whispering “Eyes forward, young man!”. And I could see the light of his mother when Harry turned around, smiling, and whispered something to William. I’d like to think that their mother watched the whole thing, beaming with pride. And though Catherine is walking in the shadow of Lady Diana, I think she’ll come through with colours flying proudly.
And that concludes your sappiness infusion for today. Carry on! 😀
Unfortunately, I know those Chuck and Di “Spitting Image” slippers as up until only a few years ago, I owned a pair. I bought them simply because they were the most ghastly pair I could find. I think they went to the Salvation Army in a fit of cleaning…
And you didn’t save them for me? I’m offended! And don’t you dare use that lame “I didn’t know you back then” excuse! 😉
I somehow managed to avoid the “tacky commemorative” phase when I was regularly attending sci-fi cons. The tackiest thing I ever got was the infamous “Spock head” decanter – a bust of Spock, hollowed out for booze. I figured it would always be in demand by Trekkies, and if I ever grew up to host dinner parties (thank God I dodged THAT bullet), I could freak the guests out. It DID give me a very entertaining ride home on the “El” (subway) from the con. You’d be amazed that a nerd, wearing a Trek T-shirt and carrying Spock’s head in a bag, would actually terrify gang members. A group of 6 obnoxious LOUD late teens came jostling into the car, came to a screeching silent halt, stared at me for about 10 seconds, the swiftly and silently moved to another car! Ah, so many conventions, so many twisted memories. Maybe someday I’ll tell you about a gorgeous, very proper English lady bringing an entire bar full of people to tears with the exclamation “What, a Shit Factory?” 😀