Flu Shot

There is much discussion on the flu shot, that needs some de-cluttering based on common sense and a bit of Science.  Yes, Science.

1: Freshly born humans have a very basic immune system.  The first two or three days of naturally occurring breast milk contains several zillion bacteria, viruses and miscellaneous gunk to expose the infant to as many bad things as evolution allows.  You can look up the list here, on Wikipedia.

2: The human body, most often, develops immunity to many infections by being exposed to the thing that causes the infection in the first place.  The body develops of library of responses:  Sort of a "Been there, Seen that, Know how to kick its’ Ass" for the immune system.  However, the infection agent is sometimes very particular in how you can kick its’ microscopic ass.  Having Mumps does not mean you are protected against the Flu:  Both are viruses but are different viruses. 

The "Flu" virus is a sneaky little piece of work and can only be killed by very specific definitions in your immune system.  The virus constantly mutates and changes its’ definitions, which means the immune system can’t unlock and kill the little bugger.  Get one genetic marker wrong and the immunity might not work.  

(Science Content: The flu is a group of viruses; the actual name is Influenza, a family of RNA viruses of the family Orthomyxoviridae, made up of the influenzaviruses Isavirus and Thogotovirus, under three species of Influenzavirus A, Influenzavirus B and Influenzavirus C.  There are thousands of definitions.  End of Science Content)

3: You can get exposure to a new library of virus definitions by getting a "Flu Shot".  The viruses are not alive.  They are dead, but your immune system is smart enough to figure out that it now has a new library of definitions to add to the previous ones, built up since the day you were born.   

4:  The "Flu" as well as many other nasties are transmitted by sneezing, coughing and physical contact.  That’s how it moves around from person to person, contact and aerosol modalities.

5:  The most effective way to avoid the flu is to lock yourself in the basement, swathed entirely in sterile plastic, only breathing filtered air, eating sterilized food, swabbing down with disinfectant every few hours and completely avoiding contact with anyone or anything else on the planet until, roughly, May 2008.  That gets you through one flu season. 

6:  For the vast majority of people, in reasonable health, the flu symptoms are: Fever, soreness, shakes, sneezing, cough, general malaise, tiredness and feeling like crap.  Just like a common cold, except more severe.  Treatment is usually fluids, acetaminophen and rest.  Antibiotics don’t do squat, unless you get bacterial pneumonia on top of the flu. 

7:  If you gobble $300 worth of vitamins and holistic naturopathic treatments, you’ll get over the flu in a week, to a week and half.  If you do nothing but rest, take fluids and acetaminophen for the soreness, you’ll recover in seven to ten days.  You choose which one is better.

8:  Children, the elderly and those with a compromised immune system from other things are the most susceptible to the flu.  Diabetics should get a flu shot, as we fit the definition of compromised immune systems.  Children and the elderly, broadly, cannot fight the symptoms as readily as those who have a good state of health.  People don’t necessarily die from the flu, but get other illnesses while having the flu.  Pneumonia is the most common illness that people get while having the flu.  The problem is, the symptoms of pneumonia are almost exactly the same as the flu and pneumonia can take hold while your body is trying to fight the flu.

9:  The library of new flu definitions that you are exposed to (immunized to use the fancy term) are dead viruses that are incubated in a hen egg.  Why a hen egg?  Poultry carry the flu naturally and can be immunized against it the same way humans are, through exposure.  This is much better than exposing varieties of the flu to a group of people, letting them get sick and then extracting the immunity from them.  Hens don’t lay on the sofa all day long, moaning, sniffling, coughing, sleeping and watching very bad daytime TV.  Eggs are a cheap medium for growing dead flu viruses. 

The yearly library of new flu virus definitions are based on the ones from last flu season.  The World Health Organization figures that stuff out.  Although the flu virus changes from year to year, the hope is that the previous years’ library are close enough to work.  Sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t.

10:  The shot hurts a little bit for about one second.  I hate needles of every description, even taking my blood sugar with a finger prick makes me feel faint. All I can suggest is to think saucy thoughts and breathe out at the same time.  It works for me and I get the added bonus of a socially acceptable and medically necessary reason to think of some truly inventive pairings, combinations and acts that might get me arrested, slapped, invited up for a drink or given a book deal, if I ever considered writing them down, or acting on them.  All harmless fun while getting a needle.

11:  The best, realistic, protection against the flu is to wash your hands with soap and water, frequently, during the flu season.  Purell, or alcohol prep pads help if you can’t wash your hands.  Momma was right, don’t pick your nose in public, so keep your hands out of your nose, eyes and mouth until you wash your hands.  Dr. Ignatz Semmelweis discovered that basic hand washing with soap and water cut down disease transmission. in 1847.  I didn’t make the name up.  Look here if you don’t believe me. 

12:  If you’ve got the flu, stay home and stop spewing your crud all over the rest of us.  Don’t wipe your nose on strangers who pass by on the street.  If you must sneeze or cough, use a handkerchief and don’t gak all over everyone else.  Have at least a modicum of class and good sense, as well as a bit of basic hygiene.

13:  Are we creating Frankenstein viruses by immunizing everyone against the flu?  The answer is an unqualified "we don’t know".  We know that smallpox was all but eradicated from the planet when immunization was first used broadly.  Diphtheria, Tetanus, Polio and other fun illnesses have been controlled, if not eradicated through immunization.  A generation ago, a diagnosis of polio was almost a death sentence.  Polio didn’t mutate into something that would work around immunization.  

The last influenza pandemic was in 1969, the Hong Kong Flu.  But, Influenzavirus A is based on avian (birds, poultry) strains.  Birds naturally have the flu virus and humans who spends time with birds can pick up the "bird flu".  Sound, hygienic, bird and poultry-keeping practices can dramatically reduce the transmission of avian strains to humans.  In the countries where bird flu has presented itself, sound and hygienic bird and poultry-keeping practices are distant concepts on par with the mathematical implications of n-dimensional calculus. 

Dirt-poor folks who rely on the few chickens they raise to keep from starving to death, don’t have the money or time to disinfect their farms or hen houses.  This also explains why the authorities in those areas don’t bother with trying to fix the hygiene and money problem:  Quarantine, slaughtering, disinfecting, then burying the entire flock is faster and is known to work every time.  It is tough on the subsistence farmer and the family.

H5N1, the "bird flu" does not look like it can pass from human to human, but we’ve been wrong before.  Medical science used to believe that illnesses were caused by ‘ill-humors’ that could only be cured by drilling holes in the skull to let out the bad vapors.  

Tamiflu, the brand name by Roche of Oseltamivir is prescribed as a preventative treatment that can last up to six weeks or as a ”cure" that you have to take within two days of exposure to Influenza A or Influenza B.  Common side effects of Tamiflu are: nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, abdominal pain and headache.  Since the usual dosage for treatment is twice a day for five days, the side effects last almost as long as the flu, plus a day or two to get over it. 

There is a potential, with the influenza virus being such a clever bug, that it could develop an Oseltamivir-resistant strain in the future.  Much like we have antibiotic resistant bacteria now, from the over-prescription of antibiotics for every little bo-bo and sniffle.  We don’t know what can happen if we give everyone on the planet a course of Oseltamivir.  Perhaps we should go back to drilling holes in the head to let out the ‘ ill-humors’?

14:  Should you get the flu shot?  

First, if you deal with the public, like I do, presenting at events and being at other workplaces to do my job, the choice is a qualified yes. 

Secondly, being a diabetic, the recommendation is also yes.

Third, I hate being sick with the flu, also a yes. 

Fourth, a preventative round of an antiviral drug like Tamiflu can have side effects just as ugly as the flu itself.  It might contribute to the influenza virus developing an Oseltamivir-resistant strain in the future.  Not so good. 

A combination of washing hands frequently, avoiding contact with people with the flu and a flu shot makes the most sense, with the least risk and the most practicality, based on the best science we’ve got as of today.